Sugar and Salt Thoughts of Missy's Mind: Mind of Mine

Sugar and Salt Thoughts of Missy's Mind: Mind of Mine

Mind of Mine

Oh, as I sit in my castle tower I think to myself, could I live here in this spot for the rest of time? Except for the obvious reasons, eating nah getting food delivered, personal hygenie can have a bathroom installed updatairs in the junk room so oh my I think I could live in this very spot right here, how sad? Sad, indeed because I am a social butterfly and you can be very social on the social internet but the butterfly needs to swing her wings freely. I am a butterfly, I am a blogger, it is a fine line in my mind :)

So this is whatis on my mind.

Dear readers:

What a strange and long trip this has been

, words that I find myself saying more and more lately. My last post on 04/07 was merely days before a series of events that occurred that caused me to write the following log on my fb page.

I just feel the need to share as I struggle <3..........

Initial Thoughts.....

For those of you who know me, you know how much I love my father. Many know that on 4/15 my dad, Bart had a horrific auto accident/was transported to Cooper Trauma. Last Friday we were instructed to contact family for the doctors felt that my dad would not survive the night due to his injuries/vast medical issues. His trauma diagnosis active heart attack, a fractured sternum, 5 broken ribs, a lacerated spleen, free fluid in his lung and abdominal area as well as uncontrollable sugars/blood pressure. He's in Cooper's TICU, recieving excellent medical attention, has been given 9 units of blood to date & we are on day 7. As we take every moment by moment, I kindly ask for any/all prayers/good vibes to be sent towards my dad & my mom as they carry this enormous weight. Thank you all so very much.

Peace, Melissa <3

1st Update......

1st Thanks for continuing to Pray...

Dad was decreased in the meds to bring him out of the chemically induced coma,
he has NOT awaken YET.

He was placed on blood thinners (which I honestly do not know why and I asked about it)
He was taken off blood thinners. : ) I mean we were giving him blood to stabilize his blood presure.

Dad was given a trach yesterday, still is unresponsive to request/demands and cries of angst over the strong desire that I want, no I need my father to wake up and hear me, his little chatterbox.

Rach, my neice went into TICU and played her violin for her pop-pop. I cry thinking how great that was and that I missed it do to my own sorrow.

I love that Tra has been along side of me the entire way, words, actions, choc pudding, hot cocoa & ice cream. And that her husband, has been nice about it.

I love the thought of my friend, Karen who makes me believe that Dad does not want to awake today because it is a special day for John Michael and I think she is right, they are spending time together. So I hold on as he holds on, Thanks for the prayers, kind words and acts of love.

We the family of Bart thank everyone who reads this and shares in our prayers that God's will is being done. Peace <3

Next Update

So Dad is opening his eyes a bit, Praise God!

He is having great difficulty focusing & it feels like he looks past you and can't really see, when I told him to close his eyes he did, so that was good.

I believe that he can hear us to a degree but I feel that it most likely sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher,,,,blah blah blah blahblah blah!

He is unable to follow directions and still has involuntary body movements happening.

I can tell he is in pain and it makes me sad to see that but happy that he is alive!

Keep Praying as I keep Praying for Dad to Hold On!


Update # 4

James 5: 13-15

The Power of Prayer
13 Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. 14 Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven.

PRAISE, PRAISE, AND MORE PRAISE! PRAISES TO GOD! MY FATHER HAS AWAKENED!

Although he can not control his bodily movements well, He Can See Us and Make Facial Expressions As well As Move His Head Up/Down and Back/Forth to Respond to My Questions!

I sang praises to God the whole way home (except at Dunkin Donuts!)

So THANKFUL & Good To See My Dad Smile, Roll His Eyes On Purpose & Best Of All, After My Dear Friend Tracey And I Prayed Over Him & Said Our Good Nights & Goodbyes, My Dad Puckered Up For A Kiss From Me! Love Love Love It!

THANK YOU LORD JESUS!

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS PRAYED & PLEASE CONTINUE TO PRAY AS IT IS A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF MY DAD AND OUR FAMILY, PRAISE YOU LORD ALMIGHTY FOR YOU ARE THE GREATEST HEALER!


Update 05/12

Urgent request that you please pray and send healing wishes towards my father as we had a major set back tonight. A code blue was called on my dad at about 5 PM and they needed to perform CPR to bring him back and now he has been moved back to the Cooper Trauma Unit. Please pray for strength and that God's will continues to be done.


Today 05/15 I await to speak with my mother to see how my dad is doing today. As I have another fever and I am still recovering from my own surgery I think it best not to leave the surroundings of my castle tower.

Thanks for reading and feel free to share your thoughts, being of sugar or salt thoughts of your mind.

Peace Melissa

Who Am I?

Who am I?

I am a Redeemed child of God: growing in grace and in the knowledge of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ every day. It is about the personal relationship. It's about seeking God first. It's about calling on him for help before I mess up. It’s about forgiveness and Love.

I am a Sinner and a person who struggles with many things, my personal demons.

I am a Woman who loves love, peace, happiness in the smallest thing in the world.

I am a Wife who would and does do anything for the man to whom God has directed me too. Thank God for Mike as he is the perfect man, soul mate, lover, provider and friend that sustains all of my needs, even my need for God.

I am a Mother who has lost her children and struggles with the desire to have a child again. I have suffered 4 miscarriages of multiples and have buried my son, John Michael {April 23-April 24,1999}. I loved this child like no other and I know I will see my babies again.

I am a Daughter to two wonderful parents. I know that I am favored by my dad and loved by my mother. I know that my dad is changing in his mind and that my mother struggles and I pray for peace for the two of them.

I am a Sister to three. Colleen a great sister, a better mother, a good friend. Marc a brother that I love very deeply and wished I had a deeper relationship with, he is a good father, a good friend and a great brother. James, who I never had the privilege of knowing, but know that I love him the same and will see him again too.

I am an Aunt to 6 wonderful children, Damien, Derek, Hannah, Rachael, Holli and Isabel. I wish I had a greater relationship with Damien and Derek as they are my heart. I see Damien as the firstborn of my family as he was born 8 days after my marriage to his uncle Mike. I see Derek as an angel that God sent to our family one month after the death of my son. I see Hannah as the smart young woman who can do anything that she puts her mind to as long as she has someone help her with the common sense of life. I see Rachael as the very intuitive young girl who has the concerns of the world on her shoulders and needs to have peace in her mind to love herself the way she is. I see Holli as a sweet little girl that struggles to understand why she is treated by some as a little different, I see her strive for greater acceptance and I know she will struggle greater when she is finally told the truth about her beginnings in this world. I see Isabel as my Izzy, a darling little girl coming into her own and having no clue that her daddy treats her like an angel and different from her sister. These children are my children!

I am Non-judgemental, but if I do find myself making a judgement I seek God to help me in learning to be mindful that I do not know what is going on with anyone else's personal life, situation, relationships etc.

I am a Lover of food and I know that this love has lead to many enjoyable times and many emotionally stressful releases. My love has lead to many pounds that affect my health, therefore I know that surgery is the best option for me as my love of food will not change just altered as I desire this great change for myself and no one else.
I am Many things to many people, some love me, some do not. Those that do not, I respect them and pray for a change in their heart.

I am Me; a woman who enjoys life to the fullest of my ability, enjoys peace in my soul and calmness in my world.

I am...........

Auto Accident 10 2005 Trial 01 2010

4 1/2 years since my auto accident. Lets see what the courts say tomorrow. I know that I am in the right side of this but the other guy thinks he is too, The arbs split us 50/50 with the award going to me, would have bought me a new vehicle which everyone knows I need. So now we will see what a jury of our peers say! Karma and faith circle the world and I pray that they go my way.

Peace to all.

<3

SST: If it pleases the courts than it has to please me as that is that and I cannot do any more.

For the Love of Football

What a day - The Lord does Love the Saints and now I believe that they will beat the Colts in this forth coming Superbowl. Oh I wish my team was in it to win it but not so for the Chicago Bears. Lets see where it goes from here!

So it has been awhile.....

So here I am again with lots on my mind.. a phrase that continues to play on my mind is that life is a roller coaster, enjoy the ride, the ups and downs, the twist and the sudden turns because you never know when it is going to be your time to throw up, get up & walk away or get off for good. I am bogged by so many vast thoughts on so many topics from the simple to the most very intense. Mundane as who to take in a football pool, should I be in a football pool, what's the problem with a football pool you get the idea to deep life and death thinking. No two days are ever the same, how could they be? Even if you laid in the same spot for 48 hours with no one around, no media outlets, nothing the mere smallest sounds that come and go change you, your mind roaming changes you.

I pray, doesn't mean that you do, nor does it mean that you should judge me for praying nor should I judge you for not. I love you for you and I expect the same, I might even pray for your love.

I am loved and I love, I am blessed and I bless others, I am forgiven and I forgive.

Peace, Love & Good Karma I wish for every single person in the world.

SST: Change your own mind, Change the World and Do Random Acts of Kindness every chance you get!